"But then I will win her back once again. I will lead her out into the desert and speak tenderly to her there. I will return her vineyards to her and transform the Valley of Trouble into a gateway of hope. She will give herself to me there, as she did long ago when she was young, when I freed her from her captivity in Egypt.
"In that coming day," says the LORD, "you will call me 'my husband' instead of 'my master.' Hosea 2:14-16 NLT
It just got real for me all over again...
I just have to be real when I pour myself over these words that follow. I'll become vulnerable in hopes that His Words will be light to someone else's darkness. The Light always, always takes over the darkness.
You see, I sit here with tears streaming down my face because for over a week now, the words you just read from Hosea have been turning in my mind and spirit and have felt they would be what I would blog about next. I now know why the enemy has distracted me and tried to put this off yet another day. As I sat down to begin typing the verses, not fully knowing how to convey this passage I glanced to see when God first showed me these words in Hosea. I'm a bit overwhelmed right now because one of the dates, the earliest, I had noted by this passage was the day my divorce became final almost ten years ago. And yes, after ten years I need to be reminded of these words. My God has been amazingly faithful over the past ten years and my story didn't begin there, nor does it end there... in the desert...
As I ran this morning, I began to ask myself and ponder yet again, 'what is it about the desert?...what is it that makes the change from 'master' to 'husband'?... why do we ever need the desert experiences of life? ... what's so life changing? what makes the difference?...'
As I asked those questions, I decided I could best try to figure it out by looking at the desert...what makes a desert a desert? What did my desert look like?
Dry, dusty, windy, hot, scorching hot, uncomfortable, barren, lonely, not much food, even less water, prickly things, painful things....
But not alone, there was someone with me...I still don't understand this part, but the word says, 'He leads us out into the desert', so that must mean He's there with me too.
I believe sometimes, or should I say for me, it was then that I was able to give Him my attention. Yes, there were still times in my desert that I went looking for companionship, food, and rest in places my God never intended... It's called "the flesh" and yet I still am sitting here covered in it today, but today I realized this flesh also has a second covering over it called "grace" and that's why I am able to sit here and say how faithful my good God is because I am in Christ Jesus and what he has done for me.
When we are lead to the desert places, it somehow gets our attention. I don't know if it's because we finally get thirsty for God or because we finally are able to remove all the distractions. But what I do know is in the desert we do get thirsty, we do get hot and tired, we do get hungry and there's one person who's there no matter what and that's our God and His Word. For that, I am forever grateful.
But what else is it about the desert that changes us? I love the next thing the one who leads us into the desert does... He speaks tenderly to us there. He begins to say, 'I got you, we got this. I really am enough, just trust me. I have brought enough food and I have enough water to sustain you through this desert. Just trust me, I am your Source.' He speaks tenderly because everything else in the world is shouting to get our attention and get us sidetracked and distracted. He speaks tenderly as if in an intimate voice of unconditional love. He speaks tenderly because that's his heart for his beloved. He loves us so much that he tenderly whispers instead of barking out orders demanding things of us.
He then returns our vineyards. That's good to me... See as he lead us out into the desert we sometimes have to leave a lot of stuff behind... stuff... relationships, our old identity, jobs, material things...our vineyards, the things we thought brought us sustanance and provision...Vineyards back then were a source of life, provision and blessings. When we arrive in our deserts we may think all that has been taken away, but I love that God's word says he RETURNS our vineyards! He gives back and I believe since it is from Him it's even better than before. The vineyards he returns are our source of life, provision and blessing greater than anything we could've previously experienced. Is the desert sometimes still painful? Yes. Is it sometimes hard work? Yes. Anyone who owns a vineyard will tell you it's hardwork, oh but it's so worth it!! It's so worth the pruning, the picking, the crushing and the time spent in the lonely barrel fermenting. It's so worth allowing God to produce the New Wine in us.
Then there's a transformation that takes place. The Valley of Trouble is transformed into a gateway of hope. A door of hope in the middle of a desert!!! That's so good to me. So when I find myself in a "valley of trouble" I now begin to look for the door of hope!! He promises it is there somewhere. The transformation process makes something totally different out of what there was before. Begin looking for the door of hope instead of wandering aimlessly in those valleys of trouble we find ourselves in sometimes.
Then, eventhough we may still be in the desert, we finally give ourselves to him, our LORD. We give ourselves to him once again like we did in the beginning, when we were young, maybe when our marriage first begun, when we knew we had been rescued from Egypt. Sometimes in the desert we have to still remind ourselves of what God has done already. Remind ourselves of the times he came through and provided time and time again, remind ourselves of his promises and how he will not leave us nor forsake us. Remind ourselves of the love and passion we had for our God when we first came into relationship with him. If you don't have that relationship, you can, right now, just say 'I want it, God, I want you, I want you and me. I'm tired of this desert and trying to fend for myself and find food and water on my own. I want what you have. I want my vineyards returned, the ones you have for me, I want to see and walk through my door of hope.' Oh, my friend, he will meet you there. You will feel his loving arms around you and hear him speaking tenderly to you there. He loves you and me more than we can ever imagine.
That's when it happens, we throw ourselves on our God in such a way that we feel his loving embrace, we let go of what we've been so desperately holding onto and we allow him to give us new vineyards, new passion and new hope. We see him and hear him speaking tenderly like never before, and that's when we know it, that's when we realize his love is greater than anything. We choose to trust him. We choose to believe in Him...We choose Jesus and realize he has chosen us to be his very own. We realize we are in relationship based on love, pure love and not demands and laws. We realize Jesus fulfilled the law and has given us love, so much love... and that's when it happens, that's we call him 'my husband' instead of 'my master'.
Be blessed today in the grace of our Savior, our Redeemer who lives, I call him my Husband.
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